Confessions of a copy-paster

By Maimoona Ejaz

My father once taught me to “look left then look right, again look left and then look right.” This is what I was doing, looking left twice and then looking right, then I took three more steps “[Ctrl C], [Ctrl V], [Ctrl P].”

The next day while holding it in my hand with remarks “excellent work, 9/10”, I was over the moon. I could not believe it, these three actions made my life easier, happier, and yes, meritorious.

After three to four experiences, I got so confident on my random clicking on the Google options, that it became fun to close my eyes, and moving the cursor randoml, then stopping it anywhere that would becomee MY WORK.  Irrespective of the original writer I would murmur “how dare (s)he get the whole credit of the amazing writing, its my turn now!”.

My friends used to warn me, but I know they envied me for not using their brains on the right time and not having the confidence to copy-paste. Soon I was the outstanding high achiever of the class. A lot of people used to run after me for assignments.

I loved my monopoly, and when my competitor stepped in, it was a hard competition. Now I spent hours and hours searching and working hard on Google. The competitor gave me a true taste of hardwork. He used to charge as well, which made people think that his work is authentic. I said to myself “I am such a fool, why didn’t I get the idea of charging people?”. I also thought of a merger, but why would he merge with me and distribute his profits for my good?  Soon we became the bitterest of enemies, finding ways to put the other one in trouble.

After a lot of competition we were tired and the finals started. Now we were working on our own assignments. Our teacher gave us an assignment and like always, I did my three favorite steps. When I submitted the 20 marks assignment the teacher turned to me and said, “this is my very own article published in DAWN newspaper on 13^th august last year.”

So the best way to go about it is “start menu, Microsoft office word, write your own article, [Ctrl P] and then submit.”